Life As We Know It
by Demelza Robins
Summary: Harry is depressed...but enough to kill himself? Severus is chosen to save him. Are the events that transpire enough to reveal the mysteries of the past? Severitus' Challenge. No Slash.
1. The Knife

He stared at the dagger--at the sharp blade shinning in the moonlight. Just one cut over each wrist and he would be dead in minutes. No one would miss him. His 'family' would most likely celebrate, although they might mutter over the mess his blood had made in the room. His friends would mourn him, but in time they'd realize that he had saved them more personal pain and grief. The world—his world—would be shocked that he would kill himself, but they'd chalk it up to him being deranged and not all there. Some others, most notably Dumbledore, would wonder how Voldemort would be defeated now that their _weapon_ was gone…but then again, perhaps they wouldn't. Harry had proven many times over that he was too reckless to destroy the Dark Lord. Especially in the past year…

Before, the world could overlook his mistakes, saying that he had come out the better for them. In fourth year Cedric died, but Harry survived once again, even after dueling with Voldemort. During second year, Harry saved a life and killed a Basilisk. Last year was different. Harry not only managed to get his Godfather killed, he had also caused harm to his friends and unnecessary danger to his professors and ministry employees.

Everyone would be better off if he were gone.

Harry picked up the weapon. It would be so easy, really. Just a couple slashes. He remembered in primary school when suicide was discussed it was blamed on cowardice. The same wasn't true in Harry's case, though. He wasn't running from life—he was just trying to make life easier and safer for others.

Hermione. Her parents were Muggles. They didn't understand the dangers associated with the wizarding world. They didn't deserve to lose their only child because she was kind enough to befriend a boy caught in the middle of the conflict. Ron came from a wizarding family and was one of seven, but Mrs. Weasley was grief stricken when Percy left. Harry didn't know how she'd survive if one of her children actually died. He didn't want to do that to her. She was the only woman he had ever even slightly associated with the world 'mum'. The whole of Hogwarts was endangered while he was there. That was proven in third year when they had thought Sirius was after him. It was only reinforced when Cedric was killed simply because he was chosen to be a school champion.

His friends all said they were at risk anyway. Hermione was a muggle, they argued. Ron's father worked for the ministry, and the Weasley's were known for being tight with Dumbledore.

But they were at the top of the list because they were friends with him. They couldn't argue that point. The people close to him were starting to be killed off, one by one. Sirius' death confirmed it.

Harry shook with anguish. Sirius. His Godfather. His father's best friend. The only one who had really tried to take him in--to give him a place to live other than the Dursley's. The only person Harry had ever really considered a parent. He was gone. Because of Harry. Because he couldn't fucking listen to people who actually knew what the fuck they were talking about.

He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't handle the pain, the guilt, and the regret...

Harry lifted the knife.


	2. Cajoling

There were few things Severus Snape enjoyed. Potions, quiet, and an occasional glass of vodka were part of this short list. Of all the many things he didn't like, staff meetings, he decided, were at the top. They were long, boring affairs, which served more as a chance for the teachers to share school gossip and relax then to actually accomplish anything of substance. Severus did not gossip. Nor did he like to socialize. Unfortunately, since he was part of the staff, he was required to attend.

The first staff meeting of the year was held two weeks before school reconvened on September first. As usual, Severus was sitting off to the side, ignoring the people around him. He was, instead, thinking about the supplies he had yet to purchase for the fall term. Which is why he initially failed to notice his coworkers sudden silence. When he did realize the room was quiet, he looked up to see a man's head in the fireplace, staring at the Headmaster.

"Remus, this is a surprise." Albus Dumbledore rose to address him.

Remus Lupin smiled grimly. "I'm afraid it's going to be a rather unpleasant surprise, Albus." Dumbledore merely quirked an eyebrow, urging Lupin to continue. "Harry's been taken to the hospital. Arabella and I were unable to learn what had happened to him, but it was serious enough for the Dursleys' to call an ambulance…that is an emergency transport… You know they wouldn't have if it was merely a broken bone or such."

Albus appeared unconcerned that his charge was apparently ill, but the sparkle that was usually so apparent had been shadowed over. "Go to the hospital and try to learn what happened. When you do, or if you can't, report back," he ordered authoritatively.

"I already know they won't tell me, Albus. Arabella called and tried to find out already. All we know is that he was being moved from the emergency room to the ICU…whatever that is."

In the background, the professors heard a commanding voice declare exasperated, "it's the intensive care unit, Remus. I've told you this already. Being there means he is in critical condition, at least."

"Then go visit him an-" Albus was cut off by Arabella's shout, "Only immediate family can visit patients in ICU."

Remus, as well as the entirety of the staff, looked to Dumbledore for his next plan of action. Sighing, the Headmaster said, "I suppose that leaves his relatives. Remus, you are going to have to question them."

"I was afraid you'd say that," Remus sighed. Then, another thought stuck him. "Albus, do the wards work with Harry in the hospital?"

"No. That is why, when you are with the Dursleys' you are going to need to insist that Petunia stay with Harry at all times."

Remus stared at Dumbledore. "It will never happen Albus. She won't give a damn," he stated factually. "You are going to have to protect Harry yourself."

Albus considered for a moment. "Then tell her to be waiting at the hospital at five o'clock this evening. Someone from the school will meet her up there. She will remove Harry from the facility, and he will be brought back here."

"As you say, Albus." Remus agreed. "I'll go talk with her. Luckily it is a weekday, so the whale she is married to will be at work."

"Thank you, Remus. Floo back if you have any problems. Once Harry is here and safe I'll contact you with further instructions."

"I'll be waiting, headmaster." Remus acknowledged and then disappeared from the fireplace.

Albus turned back to his faculty. "Meeting dismissed. Minerva, Severus, Poppy if I could have a word?"

Once the room had emptied, Albus said to the Mediwitch, "According to Remus' report, Harry's injuries will most likely be severe. Please gather anything you think you might need and prepare the hospital for his arrival.

Poppy confirmed that she would do so, and headed back to the hospital wing. Albus then turned to Minerva McGonagal. "Minerva, assuming Mr. Potter's recovery isn't too prolonged, he is going to need accommodations for the remainder of the summer holidays. The tower will be far too lonely, I fear. Also, any permission slips or the like that he will need for the upcoming year should be taken to his aunt when he is picked up."

"Of course, Albus. I'll take care of it." Minerva answered. She then also left the room. Severus turned to the Headmaster and quirked an eyebrow. "What is it that you wish with me, Albus? Any potion Poppy may need has been prepared."

"As good as that is to hear, my friend, I had a different subject in mind." Albus answered, eyes twinkling.

Severus, wary of the Headmaster's games as they never went his way, cynically replied, "if it is my behavior you're worried about, I will attempt not to make Potter's stay too unpleasant. I dare say I'll barely see him."

"Actually, Severus, I was hoping to send you to pick him up."

Struckdumb, Severus just stared at the Headmaster for a moment. As his wits came back to him, however, he jumped out of his chair and demanded, "Are you out of your mind, Albus? If the boy is ill I hardly think he wants to see me. I know I don't wish to see him. I have no knowledge of the Muggle world, and I wish to see Petunia Dursley dead. Surely there is a someone else who is better qualified, and at least a little willing, to retrieve the boy."

"Severus, besides Poppy, you are the only person at this school with enough medical knowledge to keep Harry stabilized until he gets here. I fear his injuries stem from abuse, and you are the best person to deal with that, if he is indeed awake. Furthermore,--"

"The best person to deal with the after-effects of abuse? Albus, that takes…compassion. Something I don't have in the capacity the boy is going to need it. And surely Minerva has enough knowledge to get the boy to the school. It would make more sense for her to go…she _is_ the boy's head of house."

"Nonetheless Severus, I think it would be better if you went."

"Albus…"

"Severus, my old friend, please?" The Headmaster pleadingly asked his professor. And Severus, because he had never had the ability to tell the man no, agreed.

A/N: Thank you to those of you who have read and reviewed. I don't really want to use author notes, so anything I have to say (notes about the story, responses to reviews, etc.) will be in my bio.


	3. Taxicabs and Wheelchairs

Severus stared out the window into the busy streets of the Muggle city. He was riding in a taxicab heading toward the hospital. He had been provided with a port key for the return trip to Hogwarts, but Albus had thought that it would be best if he arrived like a Muggle. Something about making Mrs. Dursley feel at ease. 'Like I really give a damn if _that_ _woman_ feels comfortable,' Severus thought cruelly while he absentmindedly picked at the button at his collar. 'This is hell. Why do Muggles insist on tying themselves up in these clothes?' He wondered.

The cab suddenly stopped at the entrance of a building. Severus glared at the doors and the people milling around them before stepping onto the street. He glanced at the driver, who he vacantly heard saying something about payment. Annoyed, he reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out the…the thing Albus had said the money would be in, and grabbed a few notes out of it, trying to discern which one to use. After debating for a moment he decided the one with the odd hologram looked about right. He handed it to the driver, and questioned sharply, "Will that be sufficient?"

Stunned, the driver finally managed to reply, "This…I can't give you change for it, sir. Do you have something small--"

"Keep the change!" Severus announced, sick of the Muggle world already. He spun around angrily and marched of toward the doors.

As he entered the lobby he looked around guardedly. There was a woman at the front desk, but he didn't wish to interact with another faceless Muggle if he didn't have to. Instead he saw a sign on the wall listing the different departments of the hospital.

'What was it Arabella screamed? Intrusive? No that wasn't it…intensive, yes, intensive care, or some nonsense like that.' He scanned the sign for something along those lines. He found the intensive care unit, the ICU for cardio patients, and the neonatal intensive care unit. 'As immature as he is, I don't believe Potter can be classified as neonatal. I don't think he is old enough for heart problems either. Floor 4 then.' Severus decided. He looked around for stairs, but didn't see any. He did, however, see double doors with arrows above it. Cautiously he stepped over to them and pressed the 'up' button.

The doors slid open instantly, revealing a small room. Severus stepped in warily, and looked around. There were more buttons inside near the door with numbers on them. Severus pushed the button with a four on it, hoping that transporting was the proper use for the contraption. He was rewarded for the gamble when the doors closed again and he felt an ascending motion. When the machine lurched as it stopped, Severus pitched forward and had to grab the wall to keep himself from falling. He quickly exited after he had regained his balance.

He glanced around and found a sign pointing to the right. He walked down the hallway until noticing another information desk. He almost sighed, deciding there was no way to avoid speaking to the woman…especially after she asked polite, but stern, "can I help you, sir?"

"Is this the ICU?" He questioned.

"Yes, sir." She answered, glancing at the large sign on the wall next to her, announcing the Intensive Care Unit.

Ignoring her wariness, he asked "Is a child by the name Harry Potter admitted?"

"I'm not permitted to answer questions about the patients. If he is in the hospital, the desk in the lobby can assist you." She answered, calmly lying. She was alone on the floor, and wanted the man gone as quickly as possible.

"I don't need to be told that he is here as I have been alerted to that fact already. I am supposed to be meeting his aunt and wanted conformation that I was in the correct ward, since it is past our meeting time and she, as you can see, is not here."

"There is a waiting area down that hall." The nurse pointed to the left, "you can wait for her in there."

"So Mr. Potter _is _on this floor?"

"How many intensive units do you believe this hospital manages, sir?"

Severus maintained his blank expression as he nodded and headed down the hall. For a few minutes, he stalked around the hall. Growing bored with that, he entered the waiting room and paced.

By 5:15 Severus had grown impatient. At 5:30 he was irate. When the clock on the wall indicated that it was 5:45, Severus was infuriated. He was just deciding to demand or charm the nurse into letting him take Potter when a fussy, priggish woman with fading red hair entered the room. Scowling, Severus greeted smoothly, "so nice to see you again, Petunia. I only wish our meeting had occurred an hour ago."

The woman nearly jumped from her skin in fright. "What are _you_ doing here?!" she questioned sharply.

"Retrieving the boy. Where is he?" Severus asked, impatiently.

"Why did they send you?" She demanded shakily, ignoring Severus' question.

"Because I was _dying_ to see you again. Where's Potter?"

"I'm not letting you take my nephew!"

"Don't feign concern at this late date. Your nephew has been in my care every year for the last four years. Now release him to me so we can get away from each other!"

Ashen faced, Petunia left the room. Severus followed, his rage apparent in his face. As they approached, the nurse looked up and noted Petunia's obvious fear. She placed her hand on the phone next to her and asked, "is there anything wrong, madam?" as she eyed Severus in trepidation.

"No," Petunia answered unconvincingly. "I'm removing my nephew from hospital care. Please bring him to me."

Taken aback, the nurse answered, "I'm unauthorized to release a patient until the paper's are signed. You'll need to speak to his doctor."

"Please get him up here for me then." Petunia directed.

"I'll call his office…but are you sure you want Harry released? He is in critical condition…he has sustained massive blood loss. Transporting him will be unsafe, at best."

Petunia nodded, and the nurse got on her phone and called Harry's doctor. She informed Petunia that he would be down shortly. Petunia sat down in a chair that was in the hallway near the nurses' cubicle. Severus followed her and asked severely, "what's wrong with him?"

"What?" Petunia questioned, coming out of a daze.

"Potter! Why is he in this hospital?" Severus repeated. "Did your oaf of a husband knock him around?" He questioned dangerously.

"Vernon has never touched the boy!" Petunia screamed, enraged, to which Severus grunted incredulously. Continuing, Petunia said, "He did it to himself."

"What?" Severus asked. "Did it to himself!"

"As in attempted _suicide_" Petunia enunciated sarcastically.

Severus stared at her in shock for a few moments. "How?" He managed to ask.

"He slit his wrists. He was unconscious for hours before we found him."

"Hours." Severus repeated, glaring. "You left him alone for hours?"

"Yes, hours. He did it overnight…besides he is a teenage boy, not a baby. I didn't think it was necessary to check on him all the time."

"I doubt you checked on him much more when he _was_ a baby." Severus muttered.

"Excuse me? You have no right to criticize how I raised the boy. _You _aren't his father."

"I'm quite aware of that, Petunia." Severus replied dangerously. "The fact remains, however, that he is under my care ten months of the year. I am entitled to some interest in his well being.

"Pardon me." A man with graying hair interrupted. "I believe you wished to see me, Mrs. Dursley."

"Yes. I'd like Harry discharged now, please." She insisted.

"Discharged?" The man ruffled his eyebrows. "He is in critical condition. It would be unwise to move him…"

"Yes. Discharged." She commanded.

"If you're sure…" he paused, waiting for her affirmation. "I'll need you to sign a statement that you are removing him from hospital care against medical recommendation by your own free will."

"Fine." Petunia sighed.

"I'll instruct the nurse to have the paperwork arranged. If I may inquire though…why?"

Petunia hesitated, "Vernon and I though it best to place him with our own…private…physician, considering the circumstances."

"Yes. Yes, I understand. I hope your family the best of luck." The doctor sympathized before speaking to the nurse. After signing a few papers, he walked away.

The nurse waved Petunia over and indicated the papers. "You'll need to read through these and sign where indicated." She then walked down the hall and through a doorway.

When she returned, she and another nurse were pushing a cot, which held a very ashen-faced young man. "As you can see, he has not yet returned to consciousness. How would you suggest he be transported?" The nurse questioned bitingly.

Petunia turned toward Severus. "Well? What are you going to do with him?"

Severus looked at Petunia. "Do you really want me to tell you?" He asked, annoyed.

Petunia's face went white. "No! That's…okay." She assured him.

Severus turned toward the nurse. "Obviously he will be weak. Besides that, is there anything physically wrong with him? If he were to wake up, would he be able to move?"

"If he wakes up moving shouldn't hurt him. However, he has suffered from a severe loss of blood. He will be weak, possibly unable to move. There is also a possible chance of brain damage."

"Brain damage" Severus repeated, unemotionally.

"There is a very limited chance…Dr. Wilson doesn't believe he will, but it _could_ happen."

Severus considered his options. "I suppose I'll just have to carry him."

"That is strictly against regulations. He has to be taken out in a wheel chair."

"A what?" He asked annoyed. She gave him a funny look and said slowly, "A—wheel—chair."

Petunia was almost shaking in fear of discovery as she said, "he can't be taken out on a wheel chair; he isn't awake. Just let us carry him."

"He shouldn't be taken out of the hospital. He is ill! After he is physically well he is going to need psychological counseling."

"A straight-laced muggle with no knowledge of his history will be of no help! Now, excuse me." Severus said angrily as he pushed his way next to Harry and lifted him off the bed. As soon as he managed to secure the boy in his arms he stormed toward the elevators.

Petunia quickly signed the last page of the release forms and hurried after him. The nurse watched them go, worry and concern in her eyes.


End file.
